E-Mail Magickatus

Locked Doors

Afraid and lost, love abused and confused me.
Leaving a mountain of pain in a heart of gold
Trying to warn you off giving explanations of my unworthiness of you.
You could not have known, how much I wanted you and was already in love with you.
But afraid of all the pain, that I have felt several times over.
No-one could have real love for me, after all I did not deserve it.
A journey of horrid adventures, leading to now my 31st year of life.
Pain caused even by paternal souls
A deep stare into reality shows I don't deserve you.
I tried to stop you from loving me, what a mess I made unintentional pain for us both. I'm sorry.
Breathlessness is the effect, I have when I think of being without you
That I was right and you realize; I'm not special and don't deserve you.
Fear of you knowing how wrong loving me is.
The reality is you are light in my darkness, For that I will never stop trying to be a better person for US.
You're love guides me. Thank you.